Chapter 2
Life really is nothing special.
The man who had once almost become her husband was now coming to cut her throat.
Saying she wasn’t afraid would be a lie.
But this was the future shaped by Maya’s own choices.
Memories of the vows she made when she became Knight Commander came flooding back.
How ignorant she had been back then.
She had served the wrong master, and by the time she realized it, it was already too late.
Standing at the end of her life, Maya reflected on it all.
It was a life full of regret.
Now she just wanted it to end.
Once the Emperor died, her contract would be broken. Then Maya Pendragon’s humanity would return.
But Maya could not endure that.
Remembering the days she had lived while becoming one with the Emperor was horrifying.
I want to choose my own ending.
With that long-held wish, Maya raised her sword.
And drove it into herself.
The first feeling she experienced as the blade pierced her heart was relief.
It’s finally over.
She held her bleeding chest and let out a shallow breath.
She felt relieved—but regret still remained.
If I had known it would come to this…
Then she would have made different choices.
“…Maya Pendragon!”
A sharp, panicked voice called her name.
She saw a man rushing into her field of vision.
He was strikingly handsome. Perhaps even clearer than the future she had abandoned.
A stranger.
Who is that?
Maya frowned.
She heard the voices of people behind him calling, “Grand Duke!”
Only then did she realize.
It was Grand Duke Tristan.
So that’s how he looks without the helmet.
“Maya Pendragon.”
The man hurried to her and supported her body.
His hand was warm—strangely unfamiliar to her.
The Grand Duke, who always carried the distant aura of the northern mountains, frowned deeply.
“Why…? Why would you take your own life?”
“I had no reason to live.”
Cough.
She coughed up blood as she spoke.
Did he see it?
The despair she had endured all this time. Endless despair. And even more despair layered on top of it.
“I just… wanted to live for someone who believed in me.”
Such a simple wish.
Why had it been so impossible?
The Grand Duke’s grip tightened around her.
Would you understand me?
No. Of course not.
Maya changed the subject with ragged breaths.
“By the way, Grand Duke… you’re really handsome…”
It had been a long time since she spoke her thoughts so honestly, and it felt oddly freeing.
“Monstrous appearance,” they said? What nonsense.
He was more beautiful than anyone she had ever seen.
He looks younger than I expected.
His face still carried a youthful impression.
He looked barely older than a teenager.
“You were supposed to be judged properly for your crimes. Dying like this is cowardly. And…”
Tristan’s expression was firm, but there was a hint of urgency in it.
It felt like he had more to say.
His hands supporting her were warm, and his gaze was steady.
Compared to the Emperor’s murky, fog-like eyes, Tristan’s eyes made it clear—he truly meant he would not kill her personally.
Even his face is perfect in personality too.
Maya thought bitterly of her past as she looked at him.
If Tristan had been her contract partner instead of the Emperor, she would not have become a murderer like this.
“I should have met you instead…”
As her consciousness faded, she heard his voice.
“I wanted to meet you too.”
Maya was startled.
“…You were the only way to break my curse.”
Even as her awareness drifted, his voice remained gentle.
But the word curse snapped her mind back for a moment.
A curse?
She had never heard anything about that.
Was that why he always wore a helmet?
But unlike the rumors of monsters, there didn’t seem to be anything wrong with his face at all.
Tristan, noticing her widened eyes, smiled faintly.
“You were finally my chance to return to my proper age…”
“Losing hope is something I’m used to.”
The voices of his subordinates were bitter and shadowed.
I’m someone who deserves to die anyway.
Even though he called her the only way to break his curse…
Unlike the Emperor, he respected her will. That was unfamiliar.
As if he understood her choice.
Something hot welled up inside her chest.
“Sleep peacefully.”
Tristan’s sincere words pierced her heart deeply.
What curse?
Why stop mid-sentence…
She needed to listen—but her mind was already slipping away.
If there is another life, please let me not repeat the same mistakes.
That was her final thought as her eyes slowly closed.
A very deep sleep.
Maya did not believe in an afterlife.
Her life had been exhausting enough.
She didn’t want to repeat it.
Then why was she still thinking?
Is this hell?
She was surely dead—but she still had consciousness.
That was the only explanation.
She had clearly failed to reach heaven, so hell must be correct.
But unlike the usual descriptions of hell—dark and burning—this place felt warm.
Soft bedding felt strangely pleasant, and sunlight touched her face…
Wait. Sunlight?
Sunlight?
Maya gasped and opened her eyes.
She squinted at the bright light and slowly looked around.
The first thing she saw was a familiar ceiling.
She was speechless.
What? Was that a dream?
There was no way she could have survived.
Or… was she unconscious right now?
That’s possible.
If this was her final moment, she thought it was rather unfortunate.
If she had to dream, it should’ve been the moment she was appointed Knight Commander.
Then I could just cut off that bastard Emperor’s head…
But reality was cruel.
This was clearly her small room before she became a knight.
I hate this place.
She had never returned home after becoming Knight Commander.
Because it was as awful as the imperial palace.
She exhaled irritably and narrowed her eyes.
Let’s think.
There had to be a reason her consciousness was here.
She looked around her room.
A poor, shabby space used only by a single maid.
Dust floated into the air as she moved—so different from the palace where she lived as Knight Commander.
Was this some kind of punishment?
My body feels lighter than expected.
A strange uneasiness rose inside her.
She wanted to check her appearance.
But the small mirror in the room was dirty.
She blew off the dust and wiped it with her sleeve.
Finally, she saw herself.
“What is this?”
Maya let out a stunned breath.
What…?
The girl in the mirror looked like she hadn’t even grown out of adolescence.
Her eyes were a dull brown.
I haven’t awakened yet.
Members of House Pendragon awaken at age twenty, when they reach adulthood.
Those who awaken gain crimson eyes like burning flames.
It was the proof of the White Dragon bloodline.
Maya checked her wrist.
No White Dragon mark.
She definitely hadn’t awakened yet.
She sighed.
What a shame.
Her skill was already excellent—but after awakening, she had reached a level beyond human swordsmanship.
So I can’t use White Dragon either.
Her sword, named White Dragon, was summoned directly from the mark.
It had been the key to her rise to Knight Commander despite her youth and gender.
Without it, she would have faced far more resistance.
She had no good memories before turning twenty.
She endured family abuse and fought through it with her sword.
Well, compared to being the Emperor’s dog, that was nothing.
She paused.
The proposal came around this time.
Because of her awful family, she never even had a debutante ceremony.
And of course, a noble house with no real standing would never receive a proper marriage proposal.
Until Grand Duke Tristan’s proposal arrived.
…
Thinking of his face, she shook her head.
He was handsome—exactly her type—but she had no intention of accepting.
Her stomach growled.
Even unconsciously, her body kept time perfectly.
Food is important.
It had been her only pleasure when she was Knight Commander.
Before that, books had been her escape.
If I’m hungry, I should eat.
Primitive desires must be satisfied.
Desires that were truly her own, untouched by others.
How long had it been since she felt something so purely hers?
Maya walked toward the dining room she was never welcomed in.
Her steps were steady and unhesitating.
